Silence kills all and finally comes after your life!

"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."

- Abraham Lincoln

If you had told me being silent is very powerful four years back, I would have called you a liar and painted you as a weak and sheepish character. I had this Che Guevara-ness in my marrows. My spirit would fight and take anyone down. That was me, then. But now, no, things are very different with me. I have become silent - yes! But I have also learnt how to use it with wise.

If you face serious issues, people warring against you and evil being devised to tarnish you - don't fret, don't even feel a tinge of pressure, don't take anything, don't vent out. The best way to tackle problems is to remain silent. When you are silent, it is very difficult for people to read you. When it becomes difficult for people to read you, you are powerful. Yes, people will misinterpret you, misquote you, develop wrong perceptions about you, spread rumours, conspire against you and may even do the nastiest of things to bring you down. But you should keep this in mind. All that they do is only to provoke you, make you speak and spill your mind. The Holy Bible says - A fool uttereth all his mind!. So no, don't give in there. Don't lose your tough. Keep your line and length tight. We are now a free nation because a man called Mahatma who led the independence movement was silent and non violent.

Like there is always a flip-side to the coin, silence also has its darker shades. Adam Lanza who killed 26 people in Connecticut last December was silent all the time, too. This 20 year old killed everyone and finally pulled the trigger pointing to his temple. Silence kills all and finally comes after your life! Ajmal Kasab did not utter a word when he made his final walk with his hangman. Research says that a major chunk of those who commit suicide showcase reclusive behaviour.

Silence is powerful but also dangerous. Powerful - in helping you establish yourself, focus better, form a tough persona, and destroy all the wrongful things people rant about you. Dangerous - in making you a reclusive, an anti-social and appear reluctant and complacent. So what do I recommend? While you should continue to embrace silence, you should also take breaks at regular intervals - not to prove a point to others but to prove to yourself that you are not on the dangerous side of things. 

So what can you do? To whom can you talk? There is always a handful people whom you can trust. Your Mum. Your Dad. A closest friend who is understanding and wise. You should open up to them at times and talk about life at large - the good, the bad and the ugly. You can always carry a smile wherever you go. That will help you ease and add more vigour to your silence. And yea, the best thing - seclude yourself from everyone, go alone, meet the needy, and do some social work. Refrain from the inner urge of wanting to be known for the good you do. Helping somebody in secret will definitely make you feel good and keep you on the right track.

Appa Amma

A couple that prays together stays together!

- Jim Cymbala

Mum and Dad. Happily married for more than 25 years. It would be clear exaggeration to call them the perfect couple. Because there is no such thing as 'perfect' except God. Nonetheless, I am definitive in saying, they are one of the most beautiful couples. Because only through imperfections, understanding each other well and forgiving, can beauty become rich in bearing. When beauty comes out colourful, we call it love. Like a bar of gold tested and purified by fire, time tests and proves love.

This quadranscentennial love saga was triggered by the divine and ever since this tale is on an eternal hip hop roll. There is only joy and much joy. The story started with my now-85-year-old Grandma. After her first daughter's arranged marriage failed, my Paati who was already widowed made it a point to depend only on God concerning the marriage of her second daughter. So she prayed all the time. One fine day, Paati had a vision from the Lord and God revealed the face of my dad.

The Pastors brought lot of connections as part of groom-search for my Mum who was amazingly beautiful in her 20s. But Paati said NO to all the photos shown until one day she identified the face that was revealed to her in a group photograph a Pastor brought. That face belonged to my Father. Arrangements were made and my Mum and Dad became Man and Wife on June 4, 1987. How beautiful is it to know from God that this woman/man is destined to be your wife/husband!

In all these years, I have not one memory of Amma and Appa fighting or arguing over a subject. I wouldn't say there was no occasion for not-so-pleasant things to have happened. Every family has its highs and lows. But when we go through those phases, how do we handle things? In highs, do we over-joy or feel unsatisfied? Or in lows, do we over-sorrow and blame?

Though Amma and Appa do not think alike all the time, they have never been self-centred. When you are so consumed by your own self, you will have ego, envy and anger against every person without reason. My parents sweetly and blindly follow one simple thing that awes me to date - 'I am living, not for me, but for you'. They have this high realization one toward the other. Only when a person stops living for himself/herself and starts living for the other, can he/she live a blessed and holy life.

Some psychologists say - too much love will lead to untoward complications in marriage. I am baffled how this premise never had the slightest of effects in my parents' marriage. I would boldly say - show love to your spouse without measure and with no reservation. Because love becomes full, only when you empty yourself into your spouse. Give her/him all the love in the world. Appa and Amma are both in their 50s now. Would you believe, at this age, they leave me and my brother back, and go for tours alone like just married couples would do? This is unheard of. I call this - honeymooning at fifty.

Always true to you darling in my fashion!

To my Princess,

My dear Sweetheart, I do not know you. My imaginary buds have, at times, tried to visualize how you might look. Yes I confess. When night falls, while on my bed, yes, I have thought about you. So many nights, I have laid my thoughts to sleep on your comforting bosom. You do not even remotely resemble any of the women I have seen. Yes, you are unique and the most beautiful of all. Our bond is special. When I shall meet you, you would find how I had known you all my life.

When God first created Adam, Eve was within him. I dreamt a lovely dream lately - I was your Adam, you were my Eve and we lived in the garden of Eden. How true of it! Yes, you dwell within me. I know it and doubly yes, I could feel you in my heart. After all, you are my missing rib bone. When you shall be united  with me, there shall be eternal bliss. We shall be one body. You shall be mine and I shall be yours.

I have gone through turbulent times. Yes, I passed my troubled teens with much pain. The trouble persisted through my early 20s as well. I did err at times. But have never gone behind anyone but you. I might have tried so many stupid things but believe me, dear, I have never been in love with any other. The world, as you know, has always been enticing. But 'NO!', I said to all its attractions and infatuations because I know in my spirit that we are long intertwined by destiny even before the foundations of this world.

Yes, I have had crushes at various stages of my life. But for you, dear, I did crush them all. Not one thought sprouted in my mind which said - 'You should convert this crush! You should try out this girl!' I was in total control. I live with a realization that I am already your man. How can I even think of doing something stupid like that! In all sincerity, I have always been faithful to you.

I do not know anything about you - where you live, how you really look, what kind of dresses you'd like to wear, what dishes you'd love to eat, your education, your parents and friends,... No, nothing at all. Some friends here have tried to put fear in my heart saying - nowadays girls are not chaste enough!- and all those dark things people mistakenly speak. But I do not worry. I do not want to know anything. Wherever you are, I want only you. Because I am deeply and madly in love with you.

There is a big fat book called The Holy Bible that helped me find God. I read it every day. It starts with a story of marriage and ends with another story of marriage. How sweet! Even in the eyes of God, the union of man and woman is sacred. Marriages are rightly made in heaven. 

Right now, I have a strong feeling that you long to see me. Don't worry dear. You shall not tarry more. I shall soon find you and would take you home with me. And our story would end - And they lived happily ever after...

Written by,
A frog Prince waiting for that one kiss from the Princess

You are free to show, I am free to stare!

Recently I happened to overhear a conversation in a mall. The girl said to the guy, potentially her boyfriend, pointing to a direction saying the guys standing there are staring at her. Well, the details of her dressing - she was wearing a mini skirt covering only her butt crack in the back and the vaginal area in the front. She was a tall girl and her thighs were treating many desirous eyes. The top she was on was tight and short exposing her navel which was pierced and outing most of her cleavage. She had put on a lot of make-up and her skin was glowing. I could smell alcohol on both of them and that made me confirm that they were coming out of the only disco in the mall.

Six days back, the women of the nation were boiling over Abhijit Mukherjee's sexist remarks. I saw many shouting the slogan - 'It is our right to dent and paint!' - continuously and do you need words to explain how Times Now can sensationalize this! I am not supporting the comments made by the President's son though.

Three days back a BJP MLA Banwari Lal Singh from Alwar, Rajasthan was on the news. Why? Because he had written to the State's Chief Secretary asking him to ban skirts from schools. All the girls came out to the streets protesting against him shouting that the MLA's mind is very narrow.

I read in the newspapers that cinema could be a reason why women suffer crimes like rape and sexual harassment. Some had written movies and advertisements portray a provocative image of women. But most of the actors straight away oppose this theory in a vehement tone. Some of the film makers had stated, TV and cinema are only entertainments and a person's character develops at home and not in a cinema hall. Yes, agreeable.

I am not being narrow minded. No. Not at all. Nor am I going to speak for the men. I eschew it. I accept, it is a person's right to dress however he/she wishes. You can show it all or cover it all. It is up to you. Some say rapes are happening because women show it all, which is a wrongful and flawed premise. Because in the history of the world, women who were covered head to toe had also been raped in numerous occasions. But then, asking men not even to behold is just not right. If it is rightful for a woman to dress up however she wishes, it is also rightful for a man to stare however he wishes. Don't get heated up. I am being open minded in your terms, don't you get it?

Do you think all men are weak, impotent and senile that they will close their eyes when they see beautiful girls walk half nude in a public place? They will stare. Yes, they will - you like it or not! Eye to eye and eye to everywhere!! Dont get me wrong, I still maintain I am against rape. A honest question. Why does he that stares wants to get physical at all, in the first place? No, he wont risk that! You know the truth. No, no. Not because of the protests and some strict laws that are going to come up. The truth is, he already has committed adultery in his heart with the girl he stares and is content with it. And you think you can stop rape from happening? If there are strict laws coming up, rapes will be done in the mind and gratification still achieved. Now you cant arrest them, can you? Men are always men and they will continue to be.

If you think the issue has to be addressed in a serious and realistic manner, you should stop playing the blame game. The mindset of the people, in entirety, has to change. Yes, it is wrong for a person to lustfully look at a woman who is not his wife. It is equally not so honourable for a girl to walk half nude in the streets. And it is doubly wrong for men to cite this as a reason and harass her or rape her. Instead of fighting against each other, everyone should try to be practical and understand what the issue really is. The society is losing all its values and morals in exponential deceleration. There is no holiness at all in the land. People should be taught to live a pure and upright life; only then will all these issues vanish like vampire dust.

Hang them all!

I switch ON my TV and all I see is a bunch of people shouting one against the other that men who rape women should be hanged straight away. Some demand public execution.  While I mourn the death of the 23-year old Delhi student and have to appreciate the Arab-like cause-and-consequence mentality which is seemingly spreading like wildfire taking hold of the nation, there are a few things that should be given serious thought.

There was a certain Shiney Ahuja who won Filmfare Best Debut Award in 2006, a bollywood celebrity of course. In 2009, this same Shiney raped his domestic help. They say court proceedings are ongoing, but clearly, as we all know, the matter has been decisively covered. I would urge you to take your placards asking the judiciary to hang this guy first.

A girl from Amethi was abducted and raped in 2011; and a former MLA of Samajwadi Party demanded investigation on Rahul Gandhi who was tipped to be one of the perpetrators. A political drama clearly and a criminal case was filed against Rahul. In late 2012, the Supreme Court dismissed the case citing the case was without substance and has hurt Rahul's reputation. In return, Rahul urged the Supreme Court to initiate criminal contempt proceedings against the accuser. But pity, there was no one to fight the victim's case.

Bollywood Star Salman Khan has half a dozen criminal cases pending against him. In 2002, the actor was drunk and he rammed his car into a bakery killing one and injuring four. Please overcome your tendency to overlook the words KILLING ONE. He 'killed' a very poor person sleeping on the pavement. Adding to this, the actor is lately charged with giving false information and producing false witnesses to delay proceedings against him. Heinous and barbaric. Why wouldn't anyone take this up, go on marches asking for him to be hanged?

Am I asking too much? If you cry out calling capital punishment for those heinous beasts who raped the 23 year old Delhi student, why wouldn't you also cry with that same zeal and vigour asking for Shiney Ahuja and Salman Khan to be hanged? Isn't this because those guys who raped the 23 year old were not rich and famous; and you can do to them anything you want, with some noise, candles and a long march? You can demand them to be hanged straight away and very lavishly cry even for public execution. But your actors, look at your beloved actors and you wouldn't dare utter a word against them and also wouldn't let those in duty do their job.

The poor committing a crime against the affluent and they should be killed. The affluent committing the same crime, or even bigger against the poor and the matter will be closed and the voice of the poor silenced. If the affluent class does not deserve capital punishment, why should the poor be hanged? What an evil attitude people possess! Where is love and equality in my country!! When will this divide vanish for good!!!